[Talk - Salvatore]

Introduction card for Salvatore Benevici, the Ultimate Paparazzi. He's a short-ish, slim demiboy with curly bleach-blonde hair, light brown skin, and inexplicable shark teeth. He's wearing a black buttondown with the top undone, gold suspenders (with matching earrings and eyeliner,) and short shorts with thigh-highs. The absolute madman.

Sal grins.
Salvatore

Ah, hello darling. Timaeus, right? The Librarian? Can I call you Tim?

The kid with the curly bleach-blonde hair looked up from his notebook with a shark-like grin. How did he–

Tim gasps.
Timaeus

How do you know my name?? Are you–

Sal winks.
Salvatore

Oh I know lots of things, Tim, don’t worry! Salvatore Benevici at your service. The Ultimate…

He reached for something out of his pocket, but…

Sal looks annoyed.
Salvatore

Dammit, where’s my phone? And my camera! Of all times to…

He was right, my phone was missing too. I suppose that would be an obvious thing for a kidnapper to take, though. That was what happened, right? We had to have been kidnapped…

Tim looks confused.
Timaeus

Ultimate… what?

Sal laughs.
Salvatore

Paparazzi, of course! Oh I know how it sounds, we always get a bad rep. But it’s the ones who are bad at their jobs who make up things for clicks and likes, you know.

Sal sparkles.
Salvatore

My reporting accuracy record is stellar! And I’ve been on the forefront of some of the biggest leaks in this decade!

Tim smiles.
Timaeus

So you’re more like… an investigative journalist? But for celebrity gossip.

Sal pouts.
Salvatore

That makes it sound so boring, but yes. And here I am, surrounded by 15 of the most famous teenagers in the world, and I can’t even take pictures! Isn’t it awful?

Tim laughs nervously.
Timaeus

Well, if it’s any consolation, I don’t feel particularly photogenic right now.

Sal laughs.
Salvatore

Oh don’t be silly Tim, you’re gorgeous. Even with the unflattering lighting!

Tim blushes.
Timaeus

Uh– um– th-thanks???

Sal smiles.
Salvatore

Now I don’t suppose you know any more about the situation than I do, hm? Sixteen of us total, all students at Hope’s Peak Academy, no memory of how we got here…

Tim looks confused.
Timaeus

Um… no? I just woke up…

Sal chews on his pen.
Salvatore

Well, that’s that! If you find anything interesting out and about, you let me know, okay darling?

And… that was that. He ended the conversation even more suddenly than he’d started it, and resumed writing in his little notebook. I didn’t much care for the idea of getting interviewed for a gossip magazine, but maybe his investigative skills will help us figure out what’s going on.

…Does he really think I’m pretty???